Tuesday, November 23, 2010

What Kind of Pie?

A huge turnon for guys is....what?....pumpkin pie? Seriously?

Listen, I love pumpkin pie. And I love my lady. And there's nothing better than a nice fragrance on a woman. But that fragrance ain't dessert.

But who knows? Maybe come this Thursday things will heat up. Passions will run high. Bodies will comingle. And......

Oh shit. I'll have a house full of guests. And then there's that other "thing". You know, the one that tells you she's NOT pregnant. Yeah that.

Oh well. Have a Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Was I Wrong?

I've mentioned how I have a Facebook account but I'm not really into it. I check up on it twice a week or so to see if anything interesting has been posted but usually I find nothing has. Of course, I rarely post anything.

But yesterday, I thought I'd post the cutest picture of my 6-month-old son. I mean, "stop-you-in-your-tracks" cute! He's in a friggin suit and tie and looks like a Senator! Its great! But less than 15 mintues after posting it my sister-in-law (who claims she's not on Facebook much but most certainly is) posted the picture was on her page and used the exact same comment I had about the picture; "Ready for my first job interview" or something like that.

There was no sinister agenda on her part for sure, but I was kind of miffed. I only have like 25 Facebook friends and she's friends with most of them! I felt some of my thunder was stolen. One posts for comments right? Now if everybody sees it on her page first ---

I sent her a text about "stealing my post" and she kind of challenged me about it which irked me more to a level than miffed. After a slow to come around apology, that seemed insincere, she asked me why it bugged me. Well, perhaps I sound immature but it was my post of my kid on my page of my picture.

Today I've softened my stance and sort of wish I didn't say anything. I know she loves it and wants her friends (who aren't mine) to see it too, but am I asking too much that she not post it moments after I do? She could put the picture in her folder and I wouldn't care or even if she posted it a day later. I just wanted to revel in the comments at least for a bit.

But the main reason I have second thoughts is I received comments and she didn't. Now it seems as if I made a big deal of nothing. It wasn't that big a deal. I probably should have kept my mouth shut.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Easy Peasey, Lemon Squeezy

So the "procedure" wherein they wall off the little swimming tadpoles that are each the spitting image of me, was incredibly easy! Easy as a drunken ex-Catholic school girl on her first bender at college. Easy.

I got a prescription for Vicodin but I never even took an aspirin. I really didn't even need to ice although I did as a precaution Friday afternoon. In fact, on Saturday I had to keep reminding myself to take it easy. That easy.

The doctor (whom the wife thought was hot, R-girl -- but then aren't they all?) was a terribly nice guy and he answered a bunch of questions about college and medical shool. I think he was a bit younger than me and we had kids the same age. He even put on some music which at least shows I was wine and dine material. Hey, if he's going to spend that much time on my junk, I deserve to be treated right, no?

Got kinda weird, though, when he said I did a "good job with the shave". Uh. Thanks. I guess. I normally keep the lower meadows well groomed, so I guess my experience paid off.

In any event, I'm pretty much 100%. A tiny, tiny bit achey, but not a big deal at all. In three months I'm supposed to bring in a sample so they can test it to make sure all the "boys" are still locked up. I feel kinda bad for those little guys all swimming like hell in a big corn maze only there's no way out, but what are you going to do?

Then I though, wouldn't it be funny to F with the sample? My friend's wife breeds dogs so, she....urrr....ummm....shall we say takes care of them? I'm not kidding. Yep, into a little sample jar. Do you think they diagnostic place would notice? I know one thing, the full-breed dog stuff is worth a hell of a lot more than mine.

Or what if the sample was full! Ewww.....3 ounces. But funny.

Okay, enough baudiness.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Dirty Stay-Out

Well, I get neutered tomorrow.

On the plus side, at least I won't be out all night roaming the streets and howling. Nor will I be dry humping everything that moves!

Ok. Maybe I'll just stay off the streets.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Creating Jobs

A big political platform, naturally, is job creation. From what I've seen and heard lately the politicians are absolutely creating jobs. Somebody has to make those little signs held up by thin wire posts. The pin manufacturing guy is helped out as is the sticker making company. Lest we forget, the bulk-mailing companies and associated print-shops. Then of course, there's the media experts who film the commercials and the salepeople who sell the radio and TV airtime.

Linda McMahon, the former CEO of the WWE is running for Senate here in Connecticut. Short of being a businesswoman I really haven't seen any credentials indicating she is up for the job. But, she did pledge to spend $50 million to win the seat! We can debate the virtues of ultra rich people buying political posts but, hey, that $50 million went somewhere, didn't it? Much of it paid someone's salary. Way to go Linda!

I voted. Please do so if you haven't. Its flawed of course, but its the best government system in the world!

Now, please - I beg you - no more ads!