Geography 101

I've been at least through most of the states in this fine country. I've driven across the country twice, to Florida once and, of course, I've flown about the country and have stayed in many fine cities and areas, including but not limited to; much of Florida, including Key West, Boston, New York City, Atlanta, Chicago, Denver, San Francisco, San Diego, the Outer Banks of NC, Albuquerque, Las Vegas, Myrtle Beach etc. and of course ALL OVER New England. I've also been fortunate enough to visit Yellowstone, the Rockies, Yosemite, Grand Canyon, Redwood Forest, Golden Gate Bridge, San Diego Zoo, Six Flags, Cape Cod (about 50x), Disneyworld (not Land), Epcott Center, etc., etc.

But I suppose for many of us, home is home. Not all of us, but many. Certainly, some long to be somewhere else for various reasons. Not me. In my travels (I'm no jet-setter, by any stretch) I've seen and been to many, many cool places but I still love my little home state of Connecticut and can't imagine living anywhere else. Sure, today I woke up and it was 7 degrees out...but the wind was light! Sure August can be 102 with high humidity. But its home, you deal with it. Furthermore, I like the seasonal change. I like winter and love a few big ole snow-storms. The kind that shut the state down and you can just hang out all day, guilt-free, and watch bad movies.

And then, Spring! I don't know if people who live where the weather is more consistent (say, lows of 60 in the winter) can imagine the euphoria one gets that first warm spring day. I mean the first day its like 65 when its been around 35. Spring Fever! The leaves are blossoming on the trees. The car wash lines are 3 miles long. The sweeper trucks are sucking up all the road salt and sand. Golf courses are opening. Its light out later and you FINALLY have the car windows open while driving around town in your clean and shiny car and your favorite CD is blaring like mad. There's nothing else like it.

Most of our weather extremes are temperature, though. We don't get many hurricanes. The last really damaging one was 1985. We get even fewer tornadoes and I think the last one of those that hurt anybody was 1978 or thereabouts. I have felt earthquake tremors maybe twice, but not nearly enough to cause ANY damage. So, its a safe place to live. We get 2 foot snowstorms occasionally and bitchin' thunderstorms. Otherwise, not much newsworthy.

Yeah, Connecticut's pretty cool. We're the third smallest state (Dudley Moore from Arthur might say, "We're small. So small we just had the state carpeted") with the highest per capita income which is misleading. People I've met from other states on vacation or whatever seem to think we're ALL living in Greenwich Mansions but most of my friends and family live in Ranches, Colonials or Capes that cost between $225,000 and $400,000. Better than many in the country, I'm sure....but I know for sure I don't have many servants. And while we may make more money (allegedly) our cost of living it high too. We pay federal taxes (of course), high gas taxes, 6% sales taxes, personal property taxes AND income taxes. But, it is what it is.

Having said all that, I can get to Boston from my house in less than 90 minutes. A GREAT city! If you haven't been I recommend you visit once in your lifetime. I can get to New York City in about 1:45. The beach, such that it is (see Rocky Neck in inset) can be visited about 45 mins. However, we have NO waves. Long Island and all those rich pricks in the Hamptons block our surf. If we want surf, its off to Rhode Island (about the only state along with Delaware we could kick their ass). That's also about 90 minutes drive and quite crowded. We have skiing here also ( http://www.skisundown.com/) , but its on the small side. But I can be cruising the slopes inside of 45 minutes. If its big time skiing(htp://www.mountsnow.com) or snow-mobiling, that can be had in about 2:15.

Our counties are about the same size as other states towns. And we only have 7 of them. But, I can get to Massachusetts in 25 mins, New Hampshire in 1:15, Maine in 1:30, Vermont in 1:30 and New Jersey in about 2 hours. Yeah, Connecticut's small. Not carpeted though.

We're often called Yankees (but not the team - hate them!). While I guess we are, I read somewhere, that Europeans call all Americans Yanks. Then, Southerners call everyone above the Mason-Dixon Line Yanks, who, in turn, call New Englanders Yanks. Now, Southern New Englanders call northern New Englanders Yanks. Confusing, so, my theory is, if you don't have a "Brake for Moose" sign within 4 miles of your house you're not a Yankee. Also, I think one must answer questions affirmatively by saying "ayup" to be a true Yank.

Note: If you find yourself traveling throughout New England and you see the sign "Brake for Moose" do so. They'll put a hurt on your car big-time. And possibly, you too! I wonder, though, who, absent that warning, would see a moose and not slow down? 1500 pounds in the street? Maybe I can blow past it!!!

Anyway, we have Mystic Seaport (http://www.mysticseaport.org/) , Mystic Aquarium (http://www.mysticseaport.org/), some pretty good theater, museums (though not up to big city levels) UConn basketball (our professional team, since those fuckers took our Hartford Whalers hockey away - grrrrr) and the Connecticut Sun (WNBA basketball team, but nobody cares). We have the largest casino in the world (http://www.foxwoods.com/) (check out the picture at Foxwoods....they covered about every ethnicity except Eskimo, I think) which should dedicate one wing to me since I might have paid for it. Our capital, Hartford, is the Insurance Capital of the world and fully half the people I know work in insurance. We make submarines in Groton and Jet Engines all over. We are also renowned for our tobacco leaves which apparently make for a great wrapper (no, not Eminem). My town and most of the surrounding towns have very little farming except for probably tobacco. Since we have about 3.5 million residents most farmland, unfortunately, is being developed although individual towns have stepped in recently to buy up that land and keep it open. Not sure that happens in the bigger, less populous states.

We are the home to a professional golf tournament, formerly the Greater Hartford Open, as well as minor league baseball teams for the Minnesota Twins and San Francisco Giants.

Our current governor is a woman, M. Jodi Rell and we are proud to have been the first state to elect a female governor, Ella Grasso. Our last governor (a dude - John Rowland) was kicked out for having his little lakeside cabin totally remodeled for something like $27.65. Just a wee bit of corruption. He's out of prison now. Hope it was worth it!

Our state animal is a Sperm Whale but I haven't seen many of those around. Might I recommend raccoon or skunk or deer or cat or dog or something? At least I've seen those recently. Funny to see a "Brake for Sperm Whale" sign though (heh, heh, heh, heh - he said slow down for sperm).

Our state hero is Nathan Hale who when captured during the Revolutionary War pronounced as the British were about to hang him: "My only regret is that I have but one life to give for my country". That's a cool line. I would hope I'd have the balls to say that in a time like that. I'd probably pee myself though.

We are the birthplace of president George W. Bush (sorry about that), Katherine Hepburn, Mark Twain, Noah Webster and Harriet Beecher Stowe. To a lesser degree, we also gave you Michael Bolton (so, so, sorry about that!) and Moby (whom seems famous for being a whipping boy, but not for his music). Oh, and 50 Cent bought the old Mike Tyson mansion down the road. So we have that going for us.

Sports fans.....we give you ESPN! Rock on! Also, former baseball MVPs Jeff Bagwell, Mo Vaughn as well as Bruce Jenner, Dorothy Hamill and Steve Young. Of course, there's more, but that's a small sampling.

The movie Mystic Pizza took place in a real pizza place in the real town of Mystic. From television, Judging Amy is set in Hartford, although the outdoor scenes I've seen from it don't much resemble Connecticut. From that show, Amy Brenneman is from CT. As are Glenn Close, Topher Grace, Meg Ryan and others.

Our largest newspaper is The Hartford Courant which holds the title "Longest Continuously Published Paper" in the U.S. Not sure what that means, but.....


We're also bisected by the Connecticut River which begins about 400+ miles north. Here is my view of Hartford as I crossed said river this morning.....sorry, crappy cell phone picture...the sign is a town border, so I must have been half way across, lol.


There you have it.....my way too long and probably boring geography lesson about my fair state. Hope you enjoyed some of it, as I was up at 1:57 thinking up facts to write about.