How Exciting

I reminded my Little One of a dentist appointment she had last night.

Her reaction? "YAAAY!!"

I need to learn to get so excited about such things. But then, who really gets excited to see their dentist?

Rating System

My Little One had her first Little League practice last night. The first time she's done anything related to baseball, actually. And she did quite well.

When I was picking her up from school and telling her how much we needed to rush to make practice in time, she made it clear that baseball was way down on her list of favorite sports. "First, is gynastis (sic), second is golf, third is hockey and fourth is stupid baseball." she proclaimed on our way to the car. Of course, she knows I love baseball and was merely trying to stick in my craw. I get a big kick out of it.

So, on the way home from practice she asked if when we got home we could play catch, practice fielding and hit. Of course I said. After over an hour, we had run out of daylight and begrudgingly headed indoors.

Seems its not so stupid after all. So in her most recent favorite saying, "whatever!".

Conference II

We had our second parent/teacher conference for our little first grader. Things were WORLDS better than last time. I mean incredibly different in every way imaginable. All for the better. So we were very proud and confident The Little One was progressing well.

Should we be concerned, however, that her teacher rather regularly has misspellings and grammatical errors in her monthly flyer? The latest was a hand written poster thingy about snakes where she mentions how they "breath" where it should read how they "breathe". So, its not really a typo.

And in my kid's world, teachers trump parents knowledge-wise. Eventually, I'm sure that willb e the case. But not YET!

To The Point!

Looks like my little first grader is getting that reading and writing thing down pat (except for the word "when" I guess). I'm thinking, however, that charm school might be in order.

Do You See What I See?

You can hope like HELL that others see in your kid what you do, can't you? Sadly, however, they probably don't.

I'm sure most see my Little One as a precociously beautiful, smart little girl. When I use my unjaded dad-eyes, I believe most think she's sweet and compassionate and funny and sassy and smart. Her after school instructors think she's the bomb and tell me so frequently when I arrive to pick her up. Co-workers, friends and family constantly compliment on how good-mannered she is and how sweet and fun she is. Her grandparents absolutely adore her, which one would expect, of course. But we can tell, both sets click with her more than their other grandchildren, whom they no-doubt love very much. But its there. Favoritism methinks.

Having said all that, I'm sure she's not her teacher's absolute favorite. I'm also rather certain her gymnastics teacher isn't so keen on her either. My daughter gets really rambunctious during gymnastics and doesn't listen as well as she should. The old-school Romanian instructor gets frustrated with her, which I think is justified. But then, isn't gymnastics about burning off excess energy and having fun? She is six after all and since I'm not seeing any gold medals in the future I just assume its a pleasurable experience for her. Which it is. And one of my sister-in-laws has had a couple negative things to say (or so I've heard) but I think it stems from jealousy in that her sort-of weird kids don't get the attention my Little One does. Honestly, part of the reason is the kids don't even say a simple "hello" when you see them and greet them. There's no eye contact and they're in their own little world. My little girl runs over and hugs and kisses everyone. So, who will get the attention in that event? Right!

Of course she's independent, sassy at times and doesn't always listen great (which we work like hell on) but she would also give you her one and only cupcake, or the last of her M&Ms, if you asked. She's an only child who doesn't want for much, but normally when she asks for something and is rebuffed, she says "that's okay, maybe we can get it for my birthday?" She shares all her toys with her friends very unselfishly and when we get overwhelmed with stuff will pick out items for us to donate. She cares for our dog compassionately and has a tremendously sophisticated sense of humor. She told me she felt badly because she was sick and thinks she might have been mean to her friend and wanted to call her today to apologize. I knew nothing about it, she volunteered it.

As a result of being sick with a fever, last night she woke up and puked all over the bed. My bed. I mean, all over! And at 5:30 in the morning. Mrs. Noveau and I, in perfect concert, got her cleaned up, the linens in the wash and the bed remade (thank GOD for that $100 mattress pad when we go the new bed).

And all The Little One was saying the entire time, even when covered in vomit, was "I'm sorry. I think I'm sick". Her concern, in her distress, was that she was putting us out. We assured her it was okay and that everyone gets sick like that and we could take care of everything which we did.

So, to her teacher, her gymnastics instructor, my sister-in-law and anybody else that feels otherwise, come visit during the off hours. Say, 5:30 this morning? Perhaps, you'd be singing a different tune. That's a sweet compassion that's in one's DNA. It can't be taught really but I'm proud as hell its there.

PPT

We had our first parent-parent-teacher conference last week to review the status of our Little One's first 3 months of school.

Our bright, precocious, hilarious, beautiful, clever, loving, stubborn, independent and fun little girl was not "all-that-and-a-bag-of-chips" to her teacher. We were rather taken aback. Her teacher admitted at the onset that TLO had a difficult week and was even a little sassy. Sassyness is something we see, of course, but never before heard expressed by someone of authority. Plus, her marks were all "at level" on most counts and "below level" on a couple. I, for one, was a bit surprised. I always envisioned any child of mine to be at the upper levels of anything she does being that the Mrs. and I are intelligient as well as diligent with our daughter's progress. I'm not majorly concerned but it is pause for thought at this particular time.

We didn't send her to the town's kindergarten, instead electing to send her to private kindergarten that touts accreditation and through-the-roof praise from all we encountered. There were signs last year (noticed by Mrs. Nouveau) that things weren't pushed as hard as we would have liked. Unfortunately, that left our Little One a bit behind. She entered first grade below the other kids and while making remarkable progress to catch up, isn't quite up to speed yet.

In addition, The Little One struggles to focus. Frequently, easy tasks that should take her mere minutes find her mind wandering off or her eyes and hands being drawn to something else often resulting in mild discipline to get her back on track or at the least a war of will. At school it creates unfinished work which we help her finish at home later on since her teacher will not "babysit" TLO to get the work done, instead electing to have the children independently finish their work. I agree with that method, especially given the fact she has 18 other students at various levels to tend to although it makes for some lengthy nights at the homework table (its actually a bar - is that bad?).

While her lack of focus its not necessarily a disability, it is very frustrating for all concerned and sadly results in so much less time for her to do kid things as she spends over an hour finishing up school based "work stations" before tackling her normally assigned homework as well as her extra reading program work. She's in first grade for crying out loud! I don't remember doing that much work.

Attention Deficit Disorder has been mentioned and her pediatrician feels any and all testing for any services she may require are best handled immediately. Her teacher, however, feels that its still too early and that we simply need a bit more time. My wife agrees with the Pediatrician so we are progressing with the tests (which the teacher needs to assist with) and I feel the teacher feels a bit offended. Perhaps because we're not taking her advice. TLO doesn't exhibit clear-cut signs of ADD though and I think if medication is mentioned we will have to think long and hard about that option. Medicating kids, to me, seems a modern way of being a lazy parent in certain cases. I would just assume handle things without any type of medication unless absolutely necessary. But I'm jumping way ahead at this point. We'll see.

At the beginning of the conference, I asked a few relatively simple questions, or so I thought. The teacher really didn't understand what I was getting at and chose to take a route wherein she interpreted my questions as questioning her. Nothing was further from the truth and in actuality I was seeking ways we could better assist the teacher and my child. She didn't hear me, so again, she came across as mildly offended and offered up a 10 minute, convoluted answer that didn't clearly answer my concerns. TLO has workstations and she brings home unfinished ones. I only wanted to know how often they did the stations. I basically got my answer, so I let it go.

The teacher is a nice lady. I sincerely believe she is doing all she can for our child with her best interests at heart. The mere fact that we don't take her advice 100% of the time in no way impugns her or reflects on our confidence of her as a teacher. It just means we differ on how to proceed. My wife is an administrator in a huge, city-wide day-care system and has also had extensive time in the classroom and I feel that makes her opinions every bit as viable as the first grade teacher's. Furthermore, my wife is one who will always, always, err on the side of caution.

As parents, we are very attentive to TLO's studies and place a premium on her being the best student she can be. At the same time, kids should have time to be kids and by the time we get settled in from school, have a snack, do homework and eat dinner, in addition to her hockey and gymnastics nights her time gets quite pinched during the week.

We are also not "not my kid" type parents. We don't blame others for her issues. If she's acted out, its not her peers fault and if she isn't already up to speed in school its not her teacher's fault. TLO is held accountable for her actions and we, as a family, will all work together to see she can be the best she can be.

Please note: my child has made utterly remarkable strides in three months of school in terms of her reading, writing and math skills. Remarkable strides. She's closing the gap on her peers and I think her teacher is seeing that as am I. But we want to have the some tests done anyway. Hell we pay plenty of taxes. If there's a program out there that will benefit her in the long term, we wish to take advantage of it as soon as possible. Any and all learning disabilities are best solved when tackled early. If there are no issues whatsover (which I think will be the case, actually) then there's no harm, no foul. Right?

Anyway, after the conference and before we got TLO from her after-school program Mrs. N and I talked in the hallway for a good long time and Mrs. N had tears in her eyes. She says all the focus issues TLO has my wife had as a child and she still has them. She says she frequently felt confused and "out of the loop" as a child due to it and hates the thought of our Little One growing up and feeling the same way she did all the time. That said, TLO has an incredible ability to seemingly not pay attention to something then know all the particular details of it afterwards even if it appeared she was up to something else. Its an uncanny multi-taskability.

My thoughts? It could be a LOT worse. My wife is 2 courses short of her Master's in Early Childhood Education. She's a respected administrator and loved by all that know her. She's smart and funny and pretty and the MOST empathetic and compassionate person I've ever known.

If my daughter grows up to be the woman her mother is, then we did one hell of a job. And I told my wife that too.

Geo W. vs. Lalas

After homework and dinner The Little One and I settled in for some Xbox video games. While she is no doubt a girlie-girl, she can be so boylike when it comes to things like games and competition; and I love it.

Anyway, at about 9 p.m. it was time to wind down and we usually watch some television together until she falls asleep. There was nothing on and I was channel surfing and asked her what she wanted to watch. She suggested "soccer" and added that they were playing soccer in gym and that she "stinks" and wants to see how to get better.

How cool is that? So I started searching for some.

But then, a few channels later, there was a thing on National Geographic channel (I think) about George Washington. She stopped me there. "No, I rather watch that" she said.

I thought to myself that was even cooler.

She watched for a good half hour before finally drifting off after telling me how George Washington was our first president and that he was on the dollar.

It was a fascinating piece and I enjoyed watching the rest of it but can't imagine it holding my attention as a just-turned-six-year-old.

1st Day

The Little One started school today. Her confidence and excitement made it so much easier for my wife and I. She'll be fine, of course, but we were understandably nervous for her being that she's boarding a bus for the first time and has to learn a whole new system of things as well as a new school and new teacher.

We thought she'd be scared. But she wasn't. She was excited and anxious to start her new adventure.

So when the time came, she bravely stepped onto the bus, turned to wave and off she went. My wife and I walked the few hundred yards back to our house and I was surprised there were no tears from the wife. We kissed quickly and off to work we went happy that our courageous little soldier was embarking on another milestone in her life.

Minutes ago, I learned my wife didn't go directly to work though. She admitted to me she was a "dork" (her words) and followed the bus to the school to make sure The Little One disembarked and made it safely into the building. Then she cried a little.

Tooth Fairy Inflation

When I arrived to pick up The Little One from school on Friday evening she delighted in showing me she had a loose tooth. A very loose tooth. How this thing went from being rather solid to practically blowing in the breeze in 9 short hours is beyond me.

Of course, she couldn't keep her fingers and tongue off it all evening. Out of the many experiences of being a young kid, that's one I remember vividly. It seemed nearly impossible not to play with that loose tooth and after it was gone, my tongue seemed bent on some primitive mission to keep fiddling with that new hole.

Flash forward to Sunday morning; 2 a.m. A tiny hand pushes my shoulder in that five-year-old-I-have-something-to-say-and-your-sleep-is-of-no-importance shove. "Daddy! Daddy! My tooth came out." It appears her night-time teeth grinding serves a purpose after all. I'm just glad she didn't swallow it.

Consequently, last night, Mrs. B set up the little tooth for the Tooth Fairy wherein I learned the going rate is $5. Holy crap is inflation that bad? I made a dime and was jealous of my friends making a quarter. Has inflation increased 50 times in the past 35 years of so? I guess so.

But then, my parents shared a car and my dad would never dream of eating lunch out every day during work and would convulse at the thought of buying a $2 coffee nearly every day like I do. I guess we can afford it.

So the Little One has a cute little gap-toothed smile that will soon be filled in by no-doubt crooked and too big teeth which will require braces in 6 or 7 years. So I have that to look forward to.

Oh. And my parents response when I thought I needed braces (not badly, but my friends all had them)? "You're a boy. You're teeth are fine." What the HELL is that supposed to mean?

Uh Oh!

"Daddy! Daddy!"

I heard the yells just as a woman seated near the McDonald's ladies' room was whispering to me, "I think she needs you."

Its not an uncommon occurrence for my 5 year old to yell to me from the bathroom when her mother's not with us. Even in public. I was quite certain it was otherwise vacant and the seated woman assured me no one had gone in for quite a while.

Of course, I'm old hat at creeping into ladies' rooms for her "issues" but I'm still surprised to find them no cleaner than men's rooms. And this one didn't smell any better either. I guess I always envisioned that women would be neater, by nature, than men and they probably are. Just not as it pertains to public rest rooms. Yuk!

Anyway, as I approached the second of two stalls I could tell the Little One was really upset. She had the door open for me and was only in her shirt, having removed her tights and skirt and tears were streaming down her face. The problem was immediately visible. Her leotard, which she went in to change into, had partially fallen in the toilet. She explained she had placed it on top of the toilet paper dispenser to change, but it fell off and landed on the seat with some of it, perhaps a quarter, landing in the water.

When I pick her up for school on Tuesdays we only have an hour to get something in her belly and get her to gymnastics. Normally, there's time to change at school but I was held up at work and since I don't want any of the teachers to have to stay as she changed, I thought she could change at McDonald's and then eat. We've done that before to monumental success.

"We have to go home and get another leotard!" she exclaimed through her tears.

I muffled a bit of laughter. It just all seemed kind of funny. I mean, there was pee in the toilet too. I gingerly tugged the outfit out and wrapped it in toilet paper and wrapped it further in her tights so it could all be thrown into the wash. Luckily, it was cold out, so we had sweatpants for her to wear and she wore a simple white top to school so I tried to convince her to go in sweats and the long tee and get special permission from gymnastics to wear them in place of a leotard. There was simply no time to go home and make it back in time.

She was still very upset so my other option to her was to cancel the class and have her do a makeup. That wasn't a good solution either. "But I have to do gymnastics on Tuesssdaaaaay" At this point I really just wanted to get out of the ladies' room since I thought at any minute someone would come in. Plus, it stank!

She ended up going with the sweats and top. Her ability to compromise lately has increased tenfold. She's still a stubborn young lady, but I totally appreciate when she's able to go with the flow.

On the rest of the drive to gymnastics I asked if the pee in the toilet was hers. It was still kind of on my mind. It was she said. I asked about the stink too. "It was gross when I went in there" was the reply. I didn't think it was her.

Of course, gymnastics understood and allowed her to participate in sweats and a tee. They can be a bit stringent, but really, who cares? Besides, the few boys don't wear leotards.

After, on the drive home we were joking about the incident and how funny it would be later on. That didn't seem the case with her, but by the time we got home she was laughing at the whole thing and she thought it hysterical when she relayed to story to her mother.

Daddy / Daughter Day

Mrs. B. had to go in to work on Saturday so I took the opportunity to have a daddy/daughter day with The Little One. Its not an unusual event but I feel guilty about doing some fun things without her mom present. At the same time I cherish the alone time with her to do fun stuff that isn't as much up Mrs. B's alley. And let's face it, The Little One is a bit different with her mother around which is a bit more clingy and dependent. I prefer the independent version.

So. What's a guy like me who's going to Vegas in 10 days during which I'll golf to do? Of course, take her to the driving range! Nearby is a covered one that is marginally heated. The heat wasn't great and it was actually a chilly 38 degrees out and snowing! Not a blizzard, but snowing. Nuts.

She rather liked the fact we were hitting golf balls into the snow so I took that opportunity to teach her that to excel at something, one has to persevere and sometimes deal with discomfort or inclement weather or whatever. I didn't use those words exactly because she's 5 but I was attempting some father-type life lessons.

Her cheeks and nose got red. Her winter jacket never came off either. And afterwards she mentioned her hands were tingly (she miss hit one at the end and I think she got a stinging sensation from it). But there was not one word of complaint from my little girl as we practiced. She kept coming back to my bucket to grab more balls with a "watch this daddy" smile and a genuine attempt to do her best. Her best has improved quite a bit from last year too, no doubt from getting bigger and stronger. And practice.

I don't instruct much. Sometimes I'll ask if she wants some but if she doesn't, I let her whack away at them. If she does, I give her one or two things to key on and she'll do it that way until her mind wanders. Its all good. I want to keep it fun and she had a blast. So did I even if I did hit them lousy myself. She's good on my ego. "Daddy. I need binoculars to see that one you hit it so far. Did you hit it over the fence?" (I didn't).

While leaving the lobby she asked if she could have some candy. I told her how proud I was of her efforts and how tough she is and I would buy her some candy, but not there.

I took her to a special candy place and wondered if she understood where we were when I was parking and walking up. Once in the that lobby, upon viewing the velvet ropes and posters she got it. We were at the movies. I took her to see Alvin and the Chipmunks which was cute and mildly amusing. And she got her candy. Sour patch kids which she shared with me over a diet Coke.

She was such a trooper through the day and continued after we got home. It was pure joy on my part and I love that time with her and I know she enjoyed it immensely as well.

Then, on Sunday she explicitly told me she likes mommy better than me. That stings a bit when its said, but its probably universal among kids and I try not to take too much offense to it. Of course, I'll still look forward to our next day together. Just she and I.

Overheard

Overheard from The Little One's room as she played Barbie with her twin sister best friends.

Twin Sister #1 (the twins are 6): I'm never going to get married because when you do you have to kiss a boy.

Twin Sister #2: Ewwwwwwww!

The Little One (remember she's 5): Well, I'm going to get married.

Both Twins: Ewwwwwwwww!

Twin Sister #1: To who?

The Little One: Um, HELLO! His name is Jake and I love him!

Hmmmmm......I just hope she's not rushing into things. She only sees him like twice a year.

Dora No Puede Explorar

My Spanish sucks. Does that translate to Dora Cannot Explore? Because she can't.


My wife and I bought the Little One a brand new loft bed. Her bedroom is small so we found that's the perfect solution for creating a bunch of space in her room so she can spread out and play. Plus we have high ceilings so it worked perfectly. Of course, the task involved totally deconstructing her room, building the bed and putting everything back in its new and spacious storage locations.

Toward the end of putting everything back, Mrs. B. stepped on one of the Little One's 3 or so Dora the Explorer dolls. This particularly irritating 15 inch bitch promptly breaks out into song, "Every boy and every girl, every where around the world....." in an incredibly shrill and irritating voice.

The Little One, sensing her mom's frustration with this pestulence, promptly ran over, grabbed little Dora by the ankles and proceeded to Paul Bunyon the thing into the new post of the loft bed. I mean a full-on, axe-type cut that Babe Ruth would have been proud of. Little Dora's head, neck and upper torso took the brunt of the blunt force trauma.

The singing stopped.

Fighting back tears of laughter, the Mrs. shot the Little One a look in an effort to "parent" even though it was hysterically funny. To which TLO responded, "What? It worked, didn't it? That thing's annoying."

Worked, it did. Probably forever. The doll doctor's prognosis for future Dora Exploration is not good. The prognosis for future stage and screen work is even dimmer.

Good.

"I can DO it"

I've mentioned my nearly four and a half year old daughter, "The Little One", a few times here but I thought a post ABOUT her would be fun. Well, maybe not fun, but I don't have any ideas today and I was just thinking of her.

Proud parents will always say how smart and bright their child is. Of course, I'm no different. I DO wonder if someone out there says, "Little Jimmy? Yeah, he's a good boy, but not the sharpest tack in the drawer". They can't ALL be smart, can they?. Anyway, I hear from her teachers and relatives and others that after a conversation with her they can't believe how smart she is or the words she uses. At four she had already met all her criteria for kindergarten, academically and socially, but doesn't start until September.

Evidently, she's a very vocal and precocious little girl who is better when others are around than for JUST mommy and daddy. Although, at times she has a slight stutter - which we're about to begin services for - the outlook is good. She uses adult phrases and words constantly and in context. She has a knack, kind of like me, for remembering lines from movies. However, packaged with her apparent intelligence and vocalization comes stubbornness and manipulation.

Case in point; this morning she was VERY difficult. Maybe she didn't' sleep enough or feel well or the cold rain is getting to her. I asked her to help me help her get dressed. "I can't do it!!" is her reply. Then she half-heartedly attempts it only when asked. Of course, the other week she did it just fine to make us "proud", as she said. I ask her to start brushing her teeth but before I can paste her brush, "I CAN DO IT!!!". Great. I let her. She does an ok job so I ask her to start her teeth (I finish them after to make sure at thorough job is done) and I get "I don't know how". Of course she does. Then I threaten her to at least start and she flicks a tooth for a second. "No, you can do better than that". Her answer is "No I can't" Next its "Little One make sure you go potty". She responds, "I don't know where the bathroom is" or "I need you to get the toilet paper".

ARGH!!

Her "pain in the ass mood" seems directly proportionate to how late we're running.

Other times, I'll ask her to do something and get, "Ok daddy!" She does it. No problems. Unfortunately, I think her agreeableness is about 50/50.

Double ARGH!! Why can't she do this all the time?

Of course, Mrs. B and I like that she's independent and a bit stubborn. Not bad traits to have as she moves into young womanhood and adulthood. But when she plays "Miss-Dependence" it drives us nuts!

Then she'll say something funny or cute and my frustration TOTALLY disappears.

And she's growing up fast. Her favorite song now is that sampled Supertramp one by Gym Class Heroes...."Take a Look at My Girlfriend....". Thinks its hysterical and I can't turn the volume up enough when its on.

In other areas, she has NEVER really napped much, even as a baby. In school she is allowed to sit and read while all the other kids nap. Then she's very likely to still be up at 11:30 at night watching a movie as Mrs. B and I sleep.

And she sleeps in our bed. I know, I know.....I don't want to hear it.

Lastly, and I may have mentioned this before, she has excellent balance and coordination. She seemingly NEVER falls down or off anything. VERY rarely hurts herself while her cousins and friends are bruised and battered and broken and stitched.

Oh, and she's CUTE AS HELL! Everyone agrees on that -- not just her parents.


** updated maybe 6 hours later -- pretty boring post, I'll try to do better. I know I can **